Mastering the Art of Professional Relationships

SVWL community member, Sarah Hays, shares insights on she how to cultivate meaningful professional relationships by applying principles she learned from growing her business.

Have you ever wondered why some professionals and business owners seem to excel with ease while others remain stuck despite their hard work? The difference often lies not in their skills or effort but in their ability to build and maintain professional relationships. Hard work and talent are of course important, but often, who you know can be just as significant as hard work and talent combined.

When I first ventured into entrepreneurship, I contemplated business ideas that would allow me to avoid interactions altogether. However, I soon realized that success in business often hinges on the ability to build relationships and connect with others. I saw peers of mine getting incredible opportunities where the only standout quality they had was who they were connected to. I wondered if success in business was reserved for the well-connected and naturally outgoing.

Although building and maintaining professional relationships is not an innate talent for all of us, we can undoubtedly hone this skill over time. By shifting my mindset and embracing curiosity and genuine interest in others, I discovered that meaningful connections could be forged even by those who may not feel naturally extroverted. And dare I say, it’s something you might even grow to enjoy over time.

As someone determined to not get in their own way, I embarked on a journey that has taught me invaluable lessons about the power of professional relationships. Now, as the owner of a video production and photography company, the ability to build and maintain relationships is a pillar of my business and a way I get the highest leverage possible on my time.

From grappling with social anxiety to embracing networking as a cornerstone of my success, here are six insights I’ve gathered along the way:

The most interesting people in the room are those genuinely intrigued by others.
In any gathering, it’s not the ones with the flashiest stories or the loudest voices who leave the biggest impression. It’s those who show a genuine interest in others. You become memorable not for what you say about yourself, but for how you make others feel like the most interesting person in the room.

So the next time you find yourself in a social setting, resist the urge to dominate the conversation with your own stories. Instead, take a genuine interest in those around you, and watch as you become the most interesting person in the room simply by being interested in others.

Ask questions that start with “what” and “how.”
The way you frame your questions can significantly impact the depth and quality of the discussion. Instead of closed-ended questions that lead to yes or no answers, asking open-ended questions starting with “what” and “how” invites more detailed responses and encourages the other person to share more about their experiences and thoughts.

For example, instead of the common question, “Have you been busy at work?” which typically elicits a simple “yes” or “no,” try asking, “What has been keeping you busy at work lately?” or “How have you been managing your way through this busy season?” These questions prompt the other person to elaborate, demonstrate your genuine interest and uncover areas of mutual interest that might not have surfaced in a more superficial conversation. It transforms the dialogue from mundane small talk into an engaging and insightful interaction. 

Don’t only ask people about work.
As someone who LOVES what they do and could talk about it all day, I find that, for many of us, what we do for work is the least interesting thing about us. We live full lives, and when people take note of the things outside of work that you are passionate about, it leaves a lasting impression. Ask people about their hobbies, their art, their friends and family, their favorite memories, or their journey. You’ll end up learning things you could have never guessed.

Be excited to see people.
Think about how you feel when a golden retriever greets you with unbridled joy. They’re not putting on an act; they’re genuinely thrilled to see you. This kind of enthusiastic reception is infectious and makes people feel valued and appreciated.

This doesn’t mean you need to adopt a bubbly persona or force excitement if it doesn’t come naturally. Authenticity is key. Find your own way to show you’re happy to see someone. This could be through a warm smile, a friendly handshake, a compliment or asking about something from your last interaction that you’ve been eager to follow up on. The goal is to make people feel their presence is appreciated and that you are genuinely happy to see them.

Find some commonality.

This may seem like a basic concept, but its roots run deep into our primal instincts. It’s a fundamental aspect of human nature to seek out similarities, as it fosters a sense of belonging and connection. 

And here’s the beautiful truth: despite our diverse backgrounds and experiences, we all share a common thread of humanity. This means that no matter how different two people may seem on the surface, there’s always something that binds them together.

For example, once during a group coaching call with people I didn’t know, we were unexpectedly paired off into groups of two to chat and find common ground. I found myself matched with someone from the other side of the world with whom it seemed I had nothing in common based on our first language, lifestyles, age, etc. However, we soon discovered that we were both in transitional periods, navigating how to move into new seasons and shed old beliefs about ourselves. This fact alone created a bond between us. Though I couldn’t tell you the name of that group or when the call happened, this is someone who I value and appreciate and someone who still checks in and supports me from afar to this day.

Maintain your relationships.

Fortunately, there are various ways to keep our connections alive and well without draining our time bank!

One option is to express your interest in continuing the relationship by suggesting future interactions. Whether it’s grabbing a coffee, attending an event together, or simply catching up over a virtual call.

Another strategy is to leverage your network to benefit both parties. If you come across an opportunity or individual that aligns with something you discussed during your conversation, consider making an introduction. Whether it’s connecting them with a potential collaborator, mentor, or like-minded individual, facilitating these connections can be immensely valuable and strengthen your bond with both parties.

In today’s world, social media platforms like LinkedIn offer an additional avenue for staying connected. Sending a connection request allows you to stay updated on their professional endeavors and milestones without the need for constant communication. It’s a convenient way to remain in each other’s orbits and show ongoing support, especially in our fast-paced lives where time for regular meet-ups may be limited.

Time is precious and schedules are packed so these small sentiments can help us stay proactive and find creative ways to stay connected!

Some of the most extraordinary moments in life unfold through our relationships with others. Our connections have the potential to transform our lives in ways we never could have imagined.

This isn’t transactional networking and the returns may not always be immediate or obvious. It’s making deposits into an account that lay the groundwork for future opportunities to arise. By extending a helping hand, making valuable introductions, and speaking positively about others, I’m also setting in motion a cycle of generosity and abundance. While I may not know exactly when or how these investments will yield returns, I end up generating so much goodwill it becomes inevitable that good things will come my way.

In essence, our relationships serve as a multiplier, amplifying the impact of our actions and opening doors to possibilities we may have never considered. As I continue to nurture and cherish my professional connections, I do so with the understanding that I have yet to bump into my greatest opportunities and most cherished collaborations. How will they come about? Through the relationships I’m nurturing today. Because some of life’s most remarkable moments are born from our connections with others, often unfolding in ways we could never have predicted.